Celebrating a Life Well-Lived, and a Heart Well-Loved

For those who may wish to say “till we meet again” to Fiona, and celebrate a life well lived, and a heart who loved and gave much, come and join us as we remember her.

Wake Services will be held on Saturday and Sunday evenings, the 6th and 7th of September, at 8pm, at Parlour 5, PJ Modern Casket, Jalan 229, Section 51A, Petaling Jaya. Because of the many people who will wish to be there, we are suggesting that the Saturday service be attended by members of Agape Chapel and her sister churches (PJGH, SSGC, BSGC, SJGC, BPGC), and the Sunday service by friends, colleagues, and people who know her through her work. Relatives are welcome to attend at any time.

Finally, a brief funeral service will be held at the same location at 10am on Monday, 8th September, followed by burial at Subang Lutheran Garden, Subang Permai. For those who do not wish to drive to SLG, a bus service will be provided. Priority will be for from out-of-town relatives, but others are free to use this as well if there are vacancies.

In The Arms of the Lord

Dearly beloved, Fiona has gone home to the Lord. After a few days of fighting increasing breathlessness, she succumbed to breathing difficulties at 10.15am on the morning of Friday, September 5, 2008.

In the couple of days before this, Fiona's breathing difficulties were increasing to the point where she required constant sedation. Even in this state, her breathing was far from easy, and her few waking moments were very uncomfortable, to say the least. As caregivers, our hearts were breaking to see her like that.

Our prayers, then, were still for God to touch her with His healing hand. But if it was not to be, then we asked for His mercies to take her quickly. Fiona's fears have always been of pain, something that most cancer patients have to contend with.

Her going home quickly then was an answer to our prayer. She experienced but a few days of discomfort before her home calling. Our response, amidst the grief, was “Thank you, Lord”. Our God is gracious, even in our times of trouble.

"I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith." 2Tim 4:7

Today, we believe and know, Fiona is enjoying the incredible delights of being in God's presence. In His presence, there is no pain, no sadness. In His presence, there is only unending joy and peace. In His presence, she has her full reward for her faith in her Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

We know this because she held on to her faith and never let go. In her last days, she spoke of going home to Jesus, and spoke it with a quiet and confident assurance. Jesus, thank you for your grace, so precious.

"Sure goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the LORD forever." Psalm 23:6

As family members, we grieve the loss of one who was so special, and we have no words to describe our pain. Our grief is great, but less than what could be, because we know where she is now, and know we will surely see her again. We count the moment, days, and years one by one till we will meet her face to face again in the presence of the Lord.

"The LORD gave and the Lord has taken away; may the name of the Lord be praised." Job 1:21

Amen.

A Quiet Rest

Fiona has finally had a relatively quiet day with only minor episodes. After days of heart-rendering struggles with breathlessness, the doctors have sedated her with a constant supply of morphine.

However, this also has the obvious effect of keeping her asleep or at least very groggy at all times. In addition, her dependence on oxygen is increased and she requires a mask at all times (as compared to just a nasal prong previously).  We are thankful, however, that she at least has been able to get some quiet rest, albeit in a sedated state.

Fiona's second chemo appointment has been cancelled.  The oncologist has determined that this is best as, in her assessment, the chemo will more likely cause harm than good at this point.  Given Fiona's severely weakened state, we agreed with this.

We continue to be thankful for the many supportive wishes and offers of help we have received. We are thankful too for the many prayers.  We continue to believe that God can still work a miracle at this point.  Please pray for Fiona to receive peace at this time, that she will have good rest.

Upheavals

It has been a trying two days for Fiona.  Her resting has been interrupted by severe panic attacks manifested in great breathing difficulties.  During these attacks, she requires a face mask and a maximum oxygen flow of 15lpm, and even then breathing requires a huge amount of effort.  In the midst of these attacks, it is clear that she is in great distress and anxiety.

Something to give thanks for:  The doctors say that the fluid in her lungs are clearing well.  Her airways sound clear and her intake of air is not obstructed.

It would seem then that the episodes are at least partially psychological. However, this does not make it any less real for her.  The episodes take an enormous amount of physical, emotional, and mental energy out of her.  To address this, the doctors have prescribed some medication, but this will take some time to work.  

Please, please pray against fear, and for God's peace to prevail at all times.  She should then regain her strength faster and be in better shape for the ongoing battle.  Pray too for upliftment in her mind and spirit. She is feeling mentally, physically, and emotionally tired from these episodes, and needs a recharge.  Pray for a spiritual recharge for her entire being.

Angels Watching Over Her

Through the turmoil of the last 24 hours, we are convinced that God has sent angels to watch over Fiona. Some of these are in the guise of people who amaze us with their compassion and dedication to blessing others.

One such person is Dr Loh Ee Chin, who is one of the very few palliative care doctors in Malaysia. Dr Loh was a true blessing today.

Last night, at about 1.30am, Fiona's breathing worsened. She was put on nebulizer to clear her lungs but she eventually required the oxygen supply to be turned up to the maximum level of 15 litres per minute due to increasing severe breathlessness. This lasted well into the morning, and even at 15lpm, she was experiencing panic attacks. The deterioration was shocking.

When contacted, Dr Loh immediately came to the hospital despite it being a Sunday and having her own plans for the day. After an examination, Dr Loh proceeded to check and clear the catheters coming from Fiona's lungs, and drain whatever fluid she could. This was a long procedure but made comfortable by Dr Loh's gentle and caring touch. Within a couple of hours of the procedure, Fiona was able to reduce her oxygen intake to about 4lpm.

At the time of this entry, she is sleeping well, after having had a simple but tasty late dinner of porridge and papaya (which she enjoyed immensely). She is on 3-4lpm and is comfortable. All praise and thanks to God for the angels He sends in different guises to remind us of His love and faithfulness.